"Smoking kills. and if you're killed you've lost a very important part of your life."

-Brooke Shields, #1 dumbest celebrity quote

There are some things made in life that should just be unmade. Very awkward things. Things that are a complete waste for 19.95 plus shipping and handling.
Like, for example, snuggies.

What the hell is a snuggy, you might ask?

Actually, my friend. It is quite an ingenious invention. A little contraption kind of like the everyday blanket you would find in any home. Although, unlike the everyday blanket, it has sleeves. Because blankets sometimes render you helpless. Ever want to pick up a remote, but find yourself unable to without the blanket slipping off your cold, shivering arms? Well, problem's solved, mate. You will never have to sacrifice your warmth to change the channel ever again.

It does sound quite a bit like a robe, you might say. But does a robe come in 10 fabulous colors including cheetah and zebra print?

I didn't think so.

How about the Tiddy Bear? Ever find that your seat belt just digs ever so painfully into your arm? No?

Well, that's probably just because you're so used to it by now. But, people, we shouldn't have to force ourselves to acquire a sense of pain just so it'll, over time, become unnoticable.

So there's a quick, easy, and inexpensive solution to one of the biggest problems that we are faced with this day and age. The Tiddy Bear. The Tiddy Bear is a revolutionary new way to sit in a car with your seatbelt on and look as comfortable and cool as is possibly possible. It's simple really, and any moron can do it, which I believe is the group of people this product is targeting. You just velcro it on to your seat belt and slide it up and down until it's at a discomfort part. Voila! That discomfort spot is no longer a discomfort spot. In fact, it's a spot where a bear is lying face down on your shoulder or breast, hence the name Tiddy Bear.

Say goodbye to the seat belt pains that have ever plagued the better part of your car riding life!

Now, if you so didn't quite catch my sarcastic tone of voice as I jokingly made these useless inventions seem somehow practical then you're probably one of the intelligent people yourself who makes "good" use of the Tiddy Bear and a Snuggie and other various products that are really lame and stupid.

Sorry, that was actually really mean. Maybe I'm the moron here, who's missing out. You're probably actually really cool and were bandoozled out of your money. Well, maybe you weren't bandoozled out of your money. Maybe these two examples of odd products actually work. Maybe I'm just being close minded. Maybe I should actually try them before I judge them.

Maybe we should all just stop being judgmental. After all, when you assume you make an ass out of you and me.